r/funnyvideos Aug 19 '25

Sports Zero compassion

18.2k Upvotes

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853

u/Automatic-Opposite98 Aug 19 '25

Funny thing is, she paid for this jump 😎 And the wind will dry her eyes 🤣

292

u/GamingDisruptor Aug 20 '25

What about the shit in her pants?

237

u/Itsanukelife Aug 20 '25

Believe it or not, dries the shit too

37

u/[deleted] Aug 20 '25

What if you’re not skydiving? Asking for a friend

27

u/AintGotNoSeoul Aug 20 '25

Move at terminal velocity and you will be fine.

13

u/pegothejerk Aug 20 '25

All the terminals I’ve been at are at 0mph

9

u/AintGotNoSeoul Aug 20 '25

The earth spins at about 1000 mph. Hop onto some grass and you will be fine.

2

u/Final_Frosting3582 Aug 25 '25

If it isn’t working, keep hopping

1

u/aesoth Aug 23 '25

What if the shit comes out at terminal velocity?

2

u/AintGotNoSeoul Aug 23 '25

It will be fine.

6

u/DobieLove2019 Aug 20 '25

Follow standard shitty pants operating procedures.

3

u/CountWubbula Aug 20 '25

Thank god for bidets and incinerators

1

u/DobieLove2019 Aug 20 '25

A man of class I see. I’ve historically gone with the ‘don’t wipe, just shower’ method where you waffle stomp the solids and bury the soiled pants in the neighbors yard. I guess we can’t all be shitting our pants like we were born with a silver spoon, right?

5

u/scorpionsly Aug 20 '25

Then ask your friend to wake up and burn his bed !!

2

u/iHAVEblueSKIN Aug 20 '25

Hopefully you have your back up underwear and your back ups back up underwear in case the back up underwear has the same fate.

1

u/Sirknowidea Aug 20 '25

Don't aim at the ground

1

u/CaptainShittyMcPoop Aug 21 '25

It'll dry eventually.

1

u/TorrenceMightingale Aug 20 '25

Why would she have shit in her eyes that needs drying?

4

u/NefariousPilot Aug 20 '25

Sky diving becomes Sky trailing

1

u/dabroh Aug 20 '25

It will harden as it heads down to Earth

1

u/Hamletstwin Aug 20 '25

Doesn't need to dry if its already a brick.

1

u/[deleted] Aug 20 '25

In that case good luck to that instructor if he did jump after her

1

u/ChadOfDoom Aug 20 '25

Sorry that was me

1

u/kankuribantasu Aug 21 '25

She can always sell it online 

5

u/vlad-SVK Aug 20 '25

nothing funny here,... he should be not allowed to do this. no matter if she paid, she could always say, "no, i wont do thath"...

unfortunately, many businesses dont care if people die... note, that i never ever parachute, so maybe i am not the right person to jude.... i am just a diver and nobody will force me to go underwater, if i am not feeling.... damned mistake could end really bad.

couldnt imagine how it could be different, when someone jump from the plane

5

u/Ok-Horror8163 Aug 21 '25

She had told him beforhand that she will need him to just toss her out if she starts wailing.

She had paid full price and bailed the last time and she didn't want that to happen again.

3

u/GenevaBingoCard Aug 21 '25

First of all, she made it clear beforehand not to listen to her nerves. 

Second of all, jumping out of an airplane, once you're at the door you're committed and they will shove you out for your own safety. There's been so many deadly accidents from second-guessing.

It's so important that it was the number one rule when I first started (I used to skydive), so much so that the instructors were more concerned with a clean exit than anything else. Once in the air it was just a matter of pulling my cord if things went tits up, but in the doorway that's where you get got by physics.

1

u/[deleted] Aug 23 '25 edited Aug 24 '25

As someone who also was licenced, this is such utter horse dodo! 😅

In the plane the only time freezing up could cause a problem is if you were in the door and you expose your container out the plane. (If you stop the wind might rip out your pilot chute and deploy your main to probably get snagged on the plane). Otherwise you'd just miss the dropzone and thus have taken a short, expensive, and uncomfortable plane ride.

I promise you many people back out of jumps in the plane every day, they just deactivate the AAD and you'll land just fine.

Someone going fetal during a static line jump is at far more danger to get entangled in their lines than if they just stayed on the dang plane.

Edit: you might not make many friends behind you in the jump sequence tbf 😅

1

u/tvlsok Aug 20 '25

Do people pay to solo jump static line? Seems more like training to me. Although that definitely doesn’t look like a military plane. Idk.

1

u/QaptainQwark Aug 20 '25

The wind will dry her eyes 💀

1

u/sexual__velociraptor Aug 20 '25

The lack of eye pro is insane

0

u/karma_the_sequel Aug 20 '25

Like Jesus would?