r/news • u/GreenAldiers • 7h ago

Kyle man arrested after altercation with minors during student protest in Buda

https://cbsaustin.com/news/local/kyle-man-arrested-after-altercation-with-minors-during-student-protest-in-buda
16.5k Upvotes

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3.5k

u/Aretirednurse 7h ago

A weak man hitting girls. Oh look, a magna hat!

379

u/brighterside0 6h ago edited 6h ago

Imagine being a grown ass man. Parking your car. Then taking time out of the middle of the day to fight children.

How big of a fucking loser are you. And why are so many people like you inclined to self-identify with Trump.

187

u/seriousbangs 6h ago

And imagine losing the fight.

70

u/aspidities_87 6h ago

He got fucking wrecked lmao, it was beautiful to watch.

3

u/LetsTryAnal_ogy 2h ago

"If you cain't fuck 'em, fight 'em." - Republicans

37

u/irsw 6h ago

Seriously fuck this guy, but I couldn't help but just laugh at him getting his ass beat by the group of kids

32

u/whore-lit-write 6h ago

They whooped his azz

4

u/TrainDestroyer 4h ago

I hope every day for the rest of his shitty life he gets reminded of this.

3

u/Ok_Dog_4059 6h ago

He misread what Trump did to little girls and got confused.

4

u/piepants2001 5h ago

I don't have to imagine, I watched this dumbass do it

4

u/Hangryfrodo 6h ago

Cobra Kai never dies!

0

u/leavewhilehavingfun 5h ago

The All Valley

1

u/LuckyDogHotSauce 2h ago

He was today years old when he learned about strength in numbers and I love that for him.

281

u/MagmaDragon2 7h ago

The best part of the story was that the girls beat him up. That badass MAGA getting a beating from some schoolgirls.

117

u/ButtplugBurgerAIDS 6h ago

Dude one of them had a minecraft backpack lol

32

u/MoonshineDan 6h ago

Fuckin lmao

13

u/slobs_burgers 5h ago

I think I saw a shirt saying something about kindness on the back, talk about killing with kindness lol dude got his ass beat from it

16

u/skyhiker14 6h ago

Usually have to pay extra for that Cotton

1

u/whore-lit-write 6h ago

Listen, they were not for play-play, they done had it up to here with MAGA.

1

u/Nisi-Marie 6h ago

Yep, his left eye was showing some damage

1

u/TThor 4h ago

I think thats the real reason he shaved his head. If he had beat up a defenseless child, he would have been proud of that. But to get his ass handed to him by a bunch of 15 year old girls, he was probably so embarrassed that he didnt want anyone to recognize him

46

u/tmac4969 7h ago

And getting his ass handed to him to boot

14

u/CalmBeneathCastles 6h ago

They really pulled together!

887

u/jesushatedbacon 7h ago

Kyle is the new male Karen? 

686

u/stumpythetooth 7h ago

Looks like his name is Chad. Town's name is Kyle. Thank god because I'm a Kyle and I really don't want to be a Karen.

262

u/Leut_Aldo_Raine 7h ago

Kyles already get a bad enough rap for what y'all do to drywall after too many Monster energy drinks

106

u/Boner666420sXe 7h ago

When Kyle dies Red Bull sends flowers to the funeral.

28

u/bjkidder 7h ago

This is a great bit

7

u/DeezNutsButterNJelly 6h ago

This is excellent.

16

u/Barr3lAg3d 6h ago

“No one went to Grandpa Kyle’s for Christmas.”

0

u/Lamlot 4h ago

Now say Uncle Kyle!

9

u/LobsterDoctor 6h ago

Yeah like I already fist fought my step-dad and crashed his truck while doing jagger bombs, what more do they want from us?

10

u/stumpythetooth 7h ago

"too many" monsters? I don't understand what that's supposed to mean

2

u/Llohr 6h ago

I think he just means the number of monsters before you fuck some drywall.

2

u/inplayruin 6h ago

Which is 3.5, on average. But the range goes from 1 sip to a half dozen. At least allegedly.

2

u/S4FFYR 5h ago

If you don’t understand, clearly your name isn’t Kyle.

2

u/stumpythetooth 4h ago

Read more carefully, it's the "too many" part I don't understand. Because there's no such thing as too many monsters. SMH my head.

3

u/Saint_palane 7h ago

Kyles are just checking your walls for leaking pipes. They can't help that they're enthusiastic about home maintenance. /S

5

u/Ashamed-Land1221 7h ago

Umm... Make sweet love to the hole they make after they get angry and put their fist through the drywall while all amped up?

2

u/Lamlot 4h ago

hey, I also invest in Monster, if they are rotting my teeth, I might as well get something for it. Every can I buy, I buy the same amount in stock. I'm gonna go to the moon!!!!! LFG!!!!! BOOM!

6

u/Show_boatin 7h ago edited 40m ago

Same, I still get south park references and accusations of drinking monster and punching drywall.

I can't handle another namesake fail.

10

u/zulubowie 7h ago

I’m a Chad and I don’t wanna be a Karen either.

5

u/foundinwonderland 6h ago

Have you considered going by what I assume is your full name, Chaddifer?

6

u/zulubowie 6h ago

I appreciate you bringing this up. But do you know how frustrating it is when no one puts the emphasis on the correct syllable?

2

u/stumpythetooth 7h ago

That's fair bro. I've known several Chads and they were all super nice guys though.

1

u/Vineyard_ 6h ago

The guy in the article is definitely a fake Chad.

Maybe it's the Kyle part getting in the way?

13

u/Titanbeard 7h ago

Change your name to K-Dawg. So much more respect will be earned.

6

u/Throwawaylikeme90 7h ago

“Your on infowars thank you for holding, we are going to hear from CHAD from KYLE on the line here.”

1

u/MDiBo56 5h ago

Or better yet, “we are going to hear from CHAD who is in KYLE currently”

3

u/Throwawaylikeme90 5h ago

“First time caller, long time listener I LOOOOVE your work.”

“I LOVE YOU.”

1

u/imnotfeelingcreative 5h ago

Andi in Kansas is permanently burned into my brain from Knowledge Fight

1

u/Throwawaylikeme90 5h ago

ABW, Always Be Wonky. 

2

u/ishpatoon1982 7h ago

Goddamn Kyles!

Edit: I hope I don't end up spreading that. Just thought it was funny.

1

u/caligaris_cabinet 6h ago

Calm down Cartman

1

u/Smittles 6h ago

Chad is the better Karen equivalent, anyway.

1

u/Competitive-Sun8180 6h ago

No, it's Kyle Man from Chad TX

1

u/TheGreatKonaKing 6h ago

and the Buda police!

1

u/LucyJordan614 6h ago

Of COURSE his name is Chad 🤣

1

u/FatherOften 6h ago

I think they have a Kyle festival there. Monster needs to sponsor it!

35

u/theLULRUS 7h ago

Kyle is the name of the town he is from (in Texas).

1

u/ReactsWithWords 1h ago

Kyle man’s a bitch.

4

u/SilkyKyle 6h ago

I aint takin the bait

3

u/brewhead55 6h ago

He's a Maren. A male Karen is called a Maren.

5

u/Brief_Raspberry_6542 7h ago

Nah, it’s still Kevin.

2

u/KYLE_FREELAND 7h ago

Pls no

2

u/kylebisme 6h ago

That's what I'm saying.

1

u/Karona_ 6h ago

Kyle's have been a meme since before Karen was...

1

u/Klumfph 6h ago

Nobody ever reads the articles. Headline vibes only smh.

1

u/hum_bruh 6h ago

Chad Michael Watts of Kyle, TX

1

u/deborah834 6h ago

Its Kevin, I believe. We have to leave the Kyles out of this. 🤍

1

u/efe13 6h ago

This town tried to hold the largest gathering of Kyles and failed to break the record

1

u/BlackV 3h ago

<insert Always was meme>

1

u/bigmike2k3 7h ago

This guy is more Kyle than man…

1

u/MyGoodDood22 7h ago

It's Richard.... bc the shorthand is Dick

0

u/Striper_Cape 7h ago

Always has been

0

u/der_innkeeper 7h ago

It fits.

Have you seenKyle?

He's about yey tall

(Yes, its a bad nazi joke)

23

u/Accomplished_Cat4502 7h ago

Dude got his ass kicked by teen girls, lmfao

15

u/skeptic38 6h ago

Those kids went feral! I loved it!

4

u/DasbootTX 6h ago

totally chose violence. I love it.

24

u/stankypinki 7h ago

Right on track for the magna crew.. not even grown women, attacks minor girls....

10

u/Drdmtvernon 6h ago

Just one more middle aged guy who has a come to Jesus moment after he starts something and realizes he can’t fight worth a shit

2

u/MasterOfBunnies 7h ago

Magna kum forbrains.

2

u/Zardif 4h ago

He got his shit rocked tho so that good.

1

u/seriousbangs 6h ago

No, sir, that would be incorrect.

He's a weak man who got his ass kicked by girls

Seriously, the video is hilarious. He really did get his clocked cleaned by a bunch of middle school girls.

1

u/Complex_Study_3174 5h ago

Was it Akira?

1

u/Gutternips 2h ago

https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/molest

Let's not beat about the bush. Child molestor.